my secret diary_*

random giler.

2010-06-09T01:39:00.002+08:00

k. aku nye confidence level peh cam taek. entah asl. haiz. but its not my fault what.

its just me?sheesh. suey betol ah born ngn confidence low nk mampos ni. haha. pade aku,sume ppmn arnd aku lebih serba serbi cantek dan segala2 nya la. aku ni, rupe tkde. height jgn ckp. bantut siket la wei. n heels aku pkai pun tk lepas. sedih pe hidup. hahaha! tapi aku thankful yg aku ade mataer yg teramat caring sama aku, jage aku baek2, tk kasi aku maki hamun, gi clubbing sume, piercings and all. (tho aku betol2 nak uat some of these things.HAHA) tapi aku respect bby busyuk aku ni. soyeah. (: no harm done anyway. and so im still a gd girl at the end of the day. he says only my kening looks like minah. phft betol. hehe.

ni post random nk mampos, sebb aku tkde org laen utk complain/whine psl keburukan aku ni. cept to maybe my mataer ah,tapi dier senang fed up. sebb utk dier,aku selawa2 nye. cam bidadari kot.haha! ohwells. least dpt jugak aku brbual ngn blog yg dah lama mati niek. which i knw tkde org lagi yg akan bace. hahaha. tapi aku appreciate, yg aku maseh punyai serba serbi kesemua yg sempurna. aku tau,ill get over this feelings soon enough. i did, but it came back. argh. ill be fineee. k i love you bby busyukk! cant wait fer tmr! ;)

time of the month,urgh.

2010-01-26T14:20:00.001+08:00

mens cramp officially suck. :(

how ugly can i get?
stupid pimples. stupid ugly,face of mine. urgh

2010-01-19T14:16:00.004+08:00

ohwell, just so you guys know.
im still pretty active in writing stuffs. but not here.
at least not for now? heh. being the fickled-minded person tht i am,
i will hereby announce that il randomly post in both my tumblr
and blog whenever i feel like i want to. its mine so like duh? (:

maybe im getting bored of blogspot, but tumblr aint tht exciting either :/

bottomline,heres my tumblr accnt! its super simple but heck (:
http://therealzura.tumblr.com

waiting for 4 o'clock to come is just pure hell! URGH

BYE LOVES! :D

sweet dream, or a beautiful nightmare.

2009-12-31T23:26:00.002+08:00

im thiiiiiis close to partying my ass off fer this year's countdown.
but who am i kidding? zura = clubbing? HAHAHA. fat chance.
spending my countdown infront of the teevo & beloved lappy.
just like every other year. no diff whtsoever even wen ive a frigging bf.
in fact, i feel goddamn single. at least pretty much for tonight.
bf too busy with his besties and family to even contact me.
so much for the promises of msging & calling me blabla. im so sick of the lies.
just what i needed. thought 2010 is gg to be awesome. guess not..

jsut fought with him otp. thiiiiis close to breaking up. sigh.
i seriously dont knw whts going on arnd here.
least he has his besties by his side now.
im..alone?

sigh f. thought of blogging my new year resolutions.
but with the mood im in, guess tht aint a gd idea.
maybe tmr or sth.

sensing the insomnia thts about to hit me,
i just drowned myself with cough syrup. i neeeed the slp,soyeah.
whatever with what ppl thinks huh?

k now i gota stone till im bored to death.
or eventually just cry to slp. either way uh.
i officially hate 2010.

kening naek-naek (;

2009-12-24T23:38:00.002+08:00

OHYEAH!

frgot to mention that i finally did my eyebrows! HEHEHE.

like finally kan! but its kening good girl soyeah, haha!

k thts all.

wth zura, so random. -_-

HEHE.

nights loves!

the real zura

2009-12-24T21:00:00.005+08:00

ahh xmas eve so far has been nth, but shit.

been long since i felt this way.

alone, lonely, neglected.

been fighting with boyfriend since morning.

ever since i woke up with a black right eye.

which looks pretty much bruised now. :(

pls eye, pls be fine by tmr morning!

now feels so much better.

after otp-ing and webcam-ing with him.

i swear, no one is able to make me feel this way. except him.

like making me smile and laugh in an instant. :D

now im sure you knw just how much i love you kan? hehe.

and im missing him so goddamn badly.

didnt contact much today. tmr onwards will be busy with sis' engagement. :(

on the bright side, will be seeing him on sunday! :D

he'll be singing for me. sweet kan. hehehe.

cant wait fer sunday to come! as in seriously. gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

his prepaid=zilch :( means no news fr him fer awhile. since morning actually.

hes watching midnight movie with his fam. fun or what!

ive never watched a midnight movie in my life. sigh. what life?

now waiting fer him, once again. sigh.

wish time would just fly now. :(

been insomniac these few days.

only God knows why. sigh.

wish i could have my proper rest/sleep soon. like seriously.

ohwells. today hasnt been such a very gd day fer me

but least it all ends well. Alhamdulilah. (:

to my christian friends,

a very merry christmas to you guys!

may you guys celebrate it in good health. <3

will blog soon bout my new year resolutions. HEHE.

im sorry but i still wish to be like her.

sigh. maybe its just me..

love, zura

more funds needed asap!

2009-12-18T17:35:00.003+08:00

just when my internet is use-able again,
after wht it seemed like ages,
i feel super beat and my eyelids are as heavy as can be.
urgh, what the hell is wrong with me!?

i so wana shape/do my eyebrows!
still waiting fer tht ohsofaithful day to come. bleah.

im supposed to get my flu vaccination jab.
but oh wth, its only the ferst week of hols,and im alrd out of funds!GAH

and lets not start on getting a haircut at Kimage.
im starting to loook like a really distressed Godzilla. honestly!

i miss my boy so much.
told you hols officially suck.
minus the tons of rest tht im able to get
to get rid of my ohsobeautiful dark rings. heeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

im seriously sleeepy. *yawns.
promise, will blog soon. bout 5th month and all.

and why the hell am i hungry,again?!
bitch.

life's a frigging blackhole.

2009-12-11T23:27:00.005+08:00

term tests are finally over. thank God.

i hope ill pass everything cept Cellbiology.

i know its silly to say that,but yeah. im prepared,babyy. hahaha!

gym-ing with thee guys,running my ass off and carrying weights was awesome!

the foursome nvr fails to amuse me in any way. (:

im reallly hoping tht my stamina will be improve as time goes on. hehe.

and yes,i want to lose as much fats as possible!

and its like urgentttttttttt lah okay! :D

his body is getting hotter as time passes. HEHE!(X

his mum still scares the shit out of me. trauma,i guess. haha.

his grandma is simply awesomeee. treats me so well. hehe.

his small lil sis is super duper cute lah.

his lil bro,mattish as usual. omg i like his new hairstyle. hahahaha.

was at amk ytd. we bumped into her.

thr goes my sanity and insecurities, going haywire as usual.

how could i not resist in wanting to be just like her!?

perfect in like almost everywhr. skinny,tall,flawless,and all.

cos she's got everything tht i have to live w/o.

i got over her. kinda. least im trying,no?

argh,nvm. i still knw he loves me no matter what! :)

and i love him back tooooo <3

mum didnt let me join my cousins somewhr at the void deck thr.

only god knws how much i hate her right now.

honestly, just how ungrateful can one get? argh. nvm.

just 2 days away to the 5th.

things are already getting out of hand.

whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

and oh!

2weeks of not meeting him is just pure hell. :(

true love,

2009-12-01T23:18:00.002+08:00

& im glad,ive found him <3

"True love doesn’t happen right away; it’s an ever-growing process.
It develops after you’ve gone through many ups and downs,
when you’ve suffered together, cried together, laughed together."

absence DOES make the heart grow fonder!

2009-11-29T00:11:00.003+08:00

i find this shittily true (:

shall blog more soon.

nose making weird trumpet sounds. :P

ps; today was awesome. thanks to youu. <3

no words could possibly describe how much i miss you,

cos boy,i miss you so

2009-11-24T15:30:00.002+08:00

waiting for French to start simply suck.

im so not looking forward to it alrd anyway, grah.

and im starting to miss him alrd. sheesh. hahaha

anyway,this morning, i almost died fr a combo of mens cramp + diarrhoea.

got some sleep, and thanks to love, i feel so much better now! :D

syg sgt pada kamuuuuuuuuuu. hehe.

right now,freezing + fighting with my sinus in the sch libr.

with his lappy on hand, listening to music, cafe world-ing and reading some stuffs.

how bored can i get?haha. n i did my learning log. bangge tersgtlah ok. haha!

i officially have only 39mins of using this lappy. befre it dies.

ni ah, si dek tuuuu mls sgt nk bwk wire charger. HAHAHA. :P

and ohyes, cant wait to meet my girls fer dinner later!

been long since i met them! time to catch up,zura!

and one fine day, i wana meet my dearest nisa too (:

been YEARS since i last saw her. taek betol. haha.

my ears are starting to hurt from my earpieces. argh.

ps. some things are better now known/read.

oh hail, insecurities!

2009-11-17T18:10:00.003+08:00

french officially suck.
i crave for long john/kfc/macdonalds and any other fast-fd related things.
blame it on my hunger-angst. and omggggggggggg.
mixed feelings,once again. don't know, don't ask.
i miss lotsa things. wait, i dont even knw wht im missing. HAH
k im officially going nuts. dont bother.
am right now accompanying love for his music lecture. so dull. hahaha
k fine, its not as dull as my stupid psychology lec. FINE,min. hehe.
anyway, currently am having a stupid migraine.
and oh yes, im finally going to the doctor. i guess so uh. (:
someones staring at me typing, n hes foorcing me to say tht he'd jus lost his wallet_-
ni name nye nk mintak simpati. ape saje. hehe. syg sgt kamu!

mitch rocks. to the max okay.
he just said tht i look anorexic.
best compliment,everrrrrrrrrrrrrr can! HAHA.

i still feel fat. period. heh
and talking bout jealousy. lets nt even start,okay?
ahhh. im a bitch. period.

and ohyes, im fugly alright.

:(

2009-11-14T23:29:00.002+08:00

its really hard to type with tears in my eyes. just like now.
i hate,hate,haaate fighting with you.
but i just really find it unfair. for me.
argh, shall not say nemore. no mood.
and i dont have any gfs to talk to, just what i needed.

why must all this happen to me,God?:(

not minah ehhhhhhhhhhh.

2009-11-14T21:50:00.003+08:00

i love my geek/mat (the irony,hehe!) so very the much! :)
happy belated 4th monthsary my dear :D

and pls eh,stop calling me minah ehhhhh.
what more your small lil minah. wah sadded. hahahaha
im so not okay. i look super decent anyway. haha!

supposed to be studying fer my religious cls exam tmr. grah.
alrightey gonna go makan now, den perhaps study. heh.
and oh yes,finally chnaged my distorted blogskin. :D

head over heels.

2009-11-14T00:30:00.002+08:00

Relationships are hard and a lot of people say that it doesn’t work without trust,
and yeah, that’s true. But I think in order to be completely head over heels,
you have to be willing to be stupid.
You have to be willing to fall.

graaaaaaaaaaaaah!

2009-11-10T23:43:00.004+08:00

ferst and foremost, would like to sincerely apologise to nur

cos am nt able to attend the Muse concert thingy at Rp tmr evening,

tho she had alrd booked the seats fer me. im so sorry dear :(

but im really really in a mess right now.with the concurring tests,hwks and lab report!

thurs- cell bio test (i knw nuts bout it!argh!) fri- maths stats test (omg)

sat - CIP newspaper collection + gym-ing sunday- religious cls main exam

next monday- cell bio test (once AGAIN!) :X

told you, im in a mess right now. ending school at 6/7 everyday aint helping neway.

having to take 3 buses definitely aint a help either. graaaaaaaaaaaaah!

my health is getting no better.

cough and flu is just pissing me off even more as time goes.

sometimes i just wana cut away my nose(as suggested once by clarence!HA)

or even to bring a damn box of tissue to sch to make things easier. hahaha.

even panadol flu cant help. neither can the cough syrup.

i think its the end. HAHAHA. ah, il be fine soon. so i hope.

and im so pissed with some shit right now.

im thiiiiiiiiiiiis close to blogging in malay,like a friggin minah. no shit.

yes,my inner minah is on the verge of coming out. haa.

but im going to spare you guys the gory details.

besides, im kinda too shagged and slpy anyway. haha.

ohwells, another day perhaps? for now,i just wana cool down.

and just live life as per normal. period.

ps;idk wht the hell is wrong with my blogskin!

but oh wth, shall do it nicely once ive the time.

nights my loves!:D

every single day for my late nights,

2009-11-08T20:58:00.001+08:00

love,

2009-11-08T20:54:00.001+08:00

tell me if its worth it,

2009-11-08T19:38:00.003+08:00

fights. ironically, its one of the things which i hated most but
it also always get to me, in whtever situation im in.
fights amongst my family is never ending,
fights with cousins (sometimes,misunderstandings,tht is)
fights with besties (last time, but nw no since i hardly see them neway)
fights with gfs in school (i dont knw if wht we're having is a fight, or cold shoulder
but whtever it is, i hate it. but whtever, maybe i deserve it)
fights with him. my love. my one and only. my everything.

she's a major loser in whtever she does.
she always make him cry, and doesnt even knw wht she did,wht went wrong.
she hates guys who kuat binget, but nvr fails to be close to them,
getting hurt in the process, and feeling shitty every other time.
its bad enough her dad and bro are the 'awesomest' guys in the whole wide Universe.
having to go thru life all these years had nvr been easy, and is not either now.
she gotta stop affecting ppl, erasing the smiles of the ppl she love,
stop making them cry(w/o knwing why),
stop being ungrateful to him,
stop making him angry by reducing my foul language,
stop making people regret in knwing her.

its bad enough, thrs hardly ppl arnd her who do truly care.
some pretend to, some perhaps truly do, but maybe she just doesnt knw it.
sometimes i think i care too much bout other ppl feelings tht,
w/o realising it i tend to frget bout my own. frget that i can hurt,too.
that im just an ordiary 17yr old girl who's life aint all tht great afterall.
that i bleed to knw tht im alive, i cry when i couldnt take it anymore,
i smile when good things happen, and feel loved, whenever he's around.

i think im having a major pms now, and i soo need my gfs to talk to.
but wth. i dont have any in poly. awesome.
cept fer sasha tht is, but dint really talk to her just now. just alil. stupid hwk.
i dont mind telling him anything and everything but sometimes, its hard
when i keep hurting him in every lil way. its like hurting myself.
how stupid can i get? i want to stop the hurting,pronto!

and he's awfully sick now. since this morning.
i really hope it aint my fault. tho i really feel guilty bout it.
making him teared and all.
i hope he'll get well soon.
and im sorry for everything..

im not such a good gf,after all am i?
but nvm, ill be fine.
ill try to be better, i promise.

and zura never break her promises, doesnt she?

oh, you'll really start to hate yourself when all you can do is
ERASE the smiles of the people you love.

always look on the brightside of life,no?

2009-11-07T00:13:00.003+08:00

on the brightside, which i evidently have frgotten to mention,
ive finally gotten my sought-for-since-ever Ripples slippers!!!!! :D
and tmr im finally going gym-ing, after wht it feeels like ages. heh
i so need to shed off these fats,babyy! HAHA.

okay,enough zura. hehe.
ohyeah, happy belated sweet 17, sab! (:

ps; i miss my dwarfies :(
pps; i miss himmmmmmmmmmm. :( :(

2009-11-06T23:37:00.002+08:00

pretty much describes what i felt at the end of sch day today.
ah, lets not even talk about it.
i guess,ive just never thought it would be this hard. thats all.

anyway,sch's been pretty much hectic this past week.
tests,assignments and BELOVED(ha!) lab reports are getting to me.
more dumb,unrelevant(to me,tht is) things to be studied.
french is pissing me off in a way, cos i cant rmb most of the damn words,
and psychology is just driving me up the wall. period.
on the bright side,csas2 is a-okay. did my presentation. was the 1st one to present.
fishcake betol. but i think i did okay. so thank god,i did mine alrd. hehe.
bmic and cell bio is making me reminscine the torture i had with bchem. ARGH

im just really,really glad i have him by my side.
still at my side, at the end of the day.
no matter how hard things may get fer us,
we'll get through the damn diploma tgt.
and if God's willing, with awesome results too. :)

not pretty or whtever shit she wants to be,
but still surviving.
tell me im stronger than this.

one and only.

2009-10-24T01:09:00.003+08:00

was reading a Seventeen mag in the sch library,

while waiting for time to past,tho it definitely felt like eons,

when my phone suddenly vibrated and his name appeared on it.

it was only like several mins before we part ways - he went for prayers.

and thr he is alrd calling me. as shocked as i was,feeling nervous if

anything had gone awry,or anything at all, i answered it.

what i heard next was even more shocking, believe it or not;

he just cooly said the sweetest 3 words, as if he'd always done that.

and but of course,i was instantaneously melted & glued to the seat.

as always, i fell in love with him all over again, just like the very ferst day.

i kept quiet for awhile, apparently still in the state of shock.

and the story goes.

bottomline is, im really thankful for the fact that hes trying so hard to be sweet etc

cos he knws his gf is such a sucker fer romantic+sweet stuffs, heh.

and that ive nvr asked for much. cos ill always love you,for who you are. period. :)

the thing is boy,i guess you have this weird spell on me which inevitably

make me fall in love with you all over again, no matter what you do,

i used to hate it, but i guess i alrd grew to love it. hehe.:D

im just really sorry if ive been a bitch,be it last week.

or these few days.

ps; i love you still.

even if its going to hurt me so bad,bout your mum not really liking me or stuffs.

just hope i can be good enough.

just hope that things will be fine,soon. Insyallah.

French,zee language of love!

2009-10-20T23:44:00.002+08:00

had my very ferst French tutorial and lecture.
3 straight hours of French fr 4 to 7pm is just way too much!
but its still awesome, and im loving it. :D
(minus the memorization part and all) haha!

being away from him had to be the worst part of the day :(,
but hell, he still managed to send me home, like normal! so :)!

and im still dreading thurs no matter whattttttt. argh.
god bless, no labs tmr! :D :D

je'taime,

ill be okay

2009-10-19T23:25:00.003+08:00

one of the pics fr today dinner date with loves :)
had an awesome time,as always,tho i was pretty shagged. heh
i love you babes!:D

right now,im waaay down. bout lotsa stuffs. sigh. ill be fine tho,soon.
diff cls with him for French is affecting me pretty bad. this sucks.
ive been effing sensitive this whole weeek. idk whts up with me! ARGH!
and ytd,i had been such a bitch to him. making him cry all. i really suck,uh.
i just hope im able to calm down pretty much soon enough.
ive to anyway. and its not bout not having trust. its just..ahh nvm.
i guess,its other girls tht i dont trust. HAHA. ohwell,lets hope fer da best? hah.

ive fallen pretty bad right now.
gotta pick myself up nowwwwwwwww.

one thing fer sure,
im gonna miss you so bad :(

and il take ur advices and try to make them happen.
that we'll be fine. love,patience and time,are some of the things we need.
its alright.
everythings gna be just..fine.

3rd monthsary!♥

2009-10-14T01:22:00.005+08:00

trying so hard to look like a mat.

but to no avail. sadded right. HAHAHA!:P

ah yes. above are some of the pics fr the 50plus pics we took today!:D

celebrated our very 3rd monthsary - movies + dine at Fish & Co!

it was awesome,but of course! hehe. didnt knw wht to get him,tho.

so simply bought him 3 small cakes. k,pathetic sgt kan. hahaha!

den after all tht,lepak-ed at his void deck thr to makan the cakes.

forced him to bring his lappy down, den of course ah,camwhored!!! :)

and lotsa other stuffs. i knw, he knw. u dont knw!! hehe. :P

i love my mat soooooo very the much! :D :D

happy the 3rddddddd,my dear! ♥

ps; awww. love is definitely awesome. esp at this point of time. heh ;)

mixed feelings. :/

2009-10-12T22:29:00.005+08:00

ahhh.ytd went to izan's sis wedding.
food was alright. went with nava,love and his fam.
his mum tumpang me,and i was effing late. was super f-ed up la. haha!
am still super duper sorry bout thattttt. argh. i suck maan. :(
then cik lina wanted to go to geylang and tamp to get some stuffs.
i just followed lah,nth better to do anyway. my mum sorta dont mind also!hehe.
and his nenek soooooo cute lah. i love her! enough said. haha!
and im still wondering why his cute lil sis kept staring at me!!
felt so conscious. thought i was wearing my kebaye terbalek kepe. HAHAHA!
on the down-side,i think cik lina dont really approve of me. :((((((((((
then i asked om,if i looked like a minah. cos i definitely dont think so can!ah nvm.

i had fun anyway!:) and finally i got to meet his bestie tu. happy banget, hah!

today,went to yishun lib cos i happen to miss the effing books!hehehe.
love accompanied me (hehe) & after choosing the bks, we went to dine at
BBQ Chicken for our lunch! i had my fav,as usual. hahahaha!
the irony of having FISH n chips at such a restaurant. -_- whtever la. hehe.
tried to find new earrings fer myself after tht,but to no avail. urgh next time den.
and oh! i bumped into stupid guanjie,who cudnt stop calling me Smurf! D:
irritating as hell,reminds me of those days. hahaha. and ohyeah,saw dil too! :)

and im feeling pretty hungry now.
but at the same time,my inner fat woman acting up laaaa. how how?:(
shit lah sey. but i really do feel fat! and i think i look fat too. urgh.
mum bought me dunkin donuts fr m'sia! omg,the thought of thee donuts
is alrd making me salivate like hell. HAHAHA. sucker fer donuts eh. hehe

i misssssssssssssssss him so much!
1hr and 19mins more to a veryyyyy special day! hehe.

ps. i'll nvr be good enough,i guess.

2009-09-30T00:09:00.004+08:00

finally meeting my ♥♥♥s tmr.after sooooooo long! hehe.
tho its just for a short raya dinner,i really cant wait to see them again :)

i'm missing him like crap now. and i mean seriously.
its been 123456789 shitty days since i last met him. urgh.
my breath felt as if it was sucked out everytime i think of him.
God, i miss him so. :(
meeting him on thurs,hope i can last that long. hehe.

am hoping that Ana can make it during this thurs raya outing too.
ill definitely pray fer her granddad to get well soon, Insyallah.

been craving super badly for cheeeeeese fries & bbq chicken's fish&chips! :(
urgh,only my syg knws how badly im craving these two items. hahaha.
ohyeah,im so looking forward to the shopping spree on fri with cuzs!
i so neeed a whole new wardrobe fer the up-coming semester! hehe:D

now hes fighting with izan. aiyo. :(
i should try stop being so affected by ppl's thingys. seriously.

argh,missing him badly. wish he'd knw. of course he'l knw,u ass. HAHA
i wish this feeling will just cease. period.

2009-09-26T16:31:00.002+08:00

argh. things are rather getting out of hand for me.
ive been awfully sick and i dont even know why.
seems like its never ending and the tons of colourful pills dont seem to work anymore.
i'm pretty much sick of trying to be so strong.
im sick of pretending that ill be fine. tht u gota go thru da storm,to get da rainbow.
im sick of praying and wishing tht it'll just come to and end.
seems like trying my best is never going to be good enough.
im losing my faith as time passes by,& i really really wish the pain would just end.
i wonder how much more can i go through all these..
idk which hurts more,the fact that im growing weaker each day,
or the fact that ive been alone all this while, and will always be..

throat's been burning like mad since ytd night,
vomited my ass off, head's spinning like nobody's business,
heat engulfing my body,stupid flu bringing me down..

i wish for all of this to end.
i dont know why someone wants me to suffer and be dead,so much.
im sorry that ive caused so much misery in this world.
im sorry that i even exist.

someone,pls lie to me tht il be fine.
lie to me. i promise, ill believe.

2009-09-24T00:45:00.003+08:00

i finally got at least half of the things from my checklist :)
and im as happy as a kuku bout it. heeeeeee.
i have my 3/4 skinnys, Paris Hilton perfume(!!), heeels and many more!
i finally discovered the wonder of wearing eyeliner,the PROPER way.hahaha
and im still dyinggggg to learn how to wear the eye-shadow!
omg,i am so turning into a woman,ppl! HAHA!
even my mum asked me since wen i started wearing perfume,
and i got stunned at her qn as much as she was,too. ;)

got my ive-been-wanting-it-since-ever cardigan today! :) :)
and got a friendship band,too tgt with love! hehe.
ohyeah, maths paper was alright. Alhamdulilah. :)

been effing sick since ytd night.
now dying from a combo of flu infection+fever+runny nose+headache+awful cough!
im dying alright. sucks to be sick on such a happy month! grrrr.
thank god im only jln raye-ing next week onwards. if im not wrong.
feeels awfully weak now. been lying in bed since,idk when :(

and my inner fat woman is so coming outttt.
this is so not good. hahaha

cos she's perfect in the wrong ways,

2009-09-20T00:44:00.003+08:00

ytd (18/9/09)

was awesome. got to finally break-fast with cuzzies at Geylang! sweeet:)
we ate at s11, mixture of stuffs. den walked around and stuffs.
definitely had fun laughing our asses off. stupid zai. HAHA
kk tmr aku mintak maaf jek dari kau ye,zai. (;
someone finally prove to me tht he somehow has balls. HAHAHA
thanks fer da sacrifice my dear. and making my wish come true. heh
as usual camwhored here and thr. above is one of the pics(:
and oh dad suddenly were sent via ambulance to ttsh,
so i had to rush to the hospital. so sorry you guys bout the abrupt thingy ):
&& thank you my love, fer accompanying me,once more :D
and oh,i finally met min's uncle,sufia and sufia's mum.
was traumatized. but yeah,think i got over tht. think so. :/

i was bored while waiting fer zam to get her hair done.
soyeah. HAHA. look at my fugly eyebags! urgh.

today (19/9/09)

nur and i accompanied zam to do her hair at chong pang! (:
from 2.30 til arnd 7plus. bloody long,thts fer sure. haha!
nur and i even managed to go shopping fer our last min raye stuffs. fun,HAHA!
i finally got myself a simple,yet nicee heeels! and 3/4 skinny pants. HEHE
okay im so excited to wear them lah okay! :) :) esp da heels. fer tmr!!! hahaha
just hopefully i wont walk arnd like an idiot, falling everytime i take a step.
cos im soooo not a heels person, duh? haha. (:
didnt get my shades and leggings. but its alright next time eh! heh
thanks nur'aidillah fitri! if not,id be so lost shopping by myself. HAHA
met love. some shits happened. dont wana talk bout it! :/
hope things are okay, by tmr and stuffs like tht. *prays*

its officially hari raya alrd!
im not THT excited,idk why :(
but whtever it is,
selamat hari raya ppl! please forgive me for any wrongdoings tht ive done
these past years, those which are accidental and those which arent. haha!
its going to be an awesome month,so enjoy urself my Muslim &(non Muslim)friends!:D

2009-09-15T23:57:00.002+08:00

yesterday (14/09/09)

had absolute fun with my ♥!

we walked pretty much alot,but still. we tremendously had lots of fun!

he know, i know. you dont know. so too bad. haha!:P

glad he (sorta) liked the lil sth which i had made fer him :)
once again,happy 2nd-monthsary my dear!

today (15/09/09)

visited grandma in ttsh with mummy!

some 'happening' stuffs happened. damn scary but fun to watch. HAHA

grandma feeling better and going to be discharged soon! Alhamdulilah :)

thanks to the visiting hrs thingy which only starts at 5(2nd time),

managed to meet ♥, and spend time with him!! hehe.

didnt do much. walked and sat arnd. talked & more. heh (:

i was so touched tht eventho he was slping like a pig,waking up at only 230pm,

he rushed thru his bath and all so tht he could meet me at Novena asap.

sweeeeeet much,no? hehe. thanks again my love! :) sygg dier! hehe.

pssss. toook some pics. above 2 are some of them. :)

reached home arnd 630 plus. ate munchy donuts+nasi lemak fer break fast.

and went fer my very ferst Terawih. ferst time in my life lah okay. HAHA!

i knw its pathetic to the max,but hell. least i completed it!ferst timer,ok! hehe.

went with dearest cuz,nur. finally i have someone to teman me.thanks love! :D

and we were so blur at da start,tht it was friggin funny. no shit. hahaha

its been some time since i spend time with her neway soyeah :)

hopefully us cousins can break fast tgt2 on fri or sth! :) :)

tmr gotta go sch fer revision fer maths stats. URGH.

on the bright side, i got to meet ♥! hehehe. break-fast with him! :) :)

cant wait. (sorta) haha!

all i need is 3 little words, that comes from the heart

2009-09-13T01:35:00.002+08:00

enough said? :P

didnt knw making pineapple tarts could be so exacting,
back-breaking, mind-blowingly irritating and anything thts related to pain.
i still do not knw why ♥ could love it oh so much. HAHA!
ive always hated making it. since ever. but since he loves it so much.soyeah!HEHE
he better be thankful maan. after all the pain tht i had to go through(;
my energy had depleted so bad tht i almost fell asleep halfway making them!:P
was shitty tired alright,& to make matters worse; didnt get to spend much time with him.
he was too busy shopping fer clothes with his fam. so syiok right! hmph. haha!

the last time my mum blanjaed me clothes was...erm. idk. sad,no? ):
ohwell. we come from diff family backgrnd eh. soyeah. im getting used to it (:
im not in much of a mood today. honestly,i dont knw why myself :/
and im boreeeeeeed like shit now. phft
on the bright side,tmr wil be my LAST day of baking cookies! (:
and meeting ♥ on monday! hehe. awesome much? (: (:

and but of course,
HAPPY THE 2ND,MY DEAR BOY ♥♥♥!
ilysm. :D

2009-09-08T00:45:00.003+08:00

i miss how things used to be for us.
i miss my girls super damn much. :(
thought i could somehow or rather, get over it,
but i guess i was wrong. way wrong.
& im honestly sorry for what happened.
im still wishing tht things could be the way it used to be..

haiz. enough of tht alrd. been pretty long since i last blogged eh?heh
grandma gt warded in beloved ttsh. visited her in the morn by myself:)
I FINALLY MET ♥, after 7 freaking days of not meeting him!GOSH.
and aww, he wore so smart and spiked his hair fer me! hehe.
he definitely made me smile like a kuku and i fell in love him all over again♥

went home,made this weird-looking cookie. mum forced me into it,phft.
its the 18th day of fasting month & i alrd made 5types of cookies! :D
fast eh time flies. seems like only ytd wen it was the ferst day of fasting! haha
means raye is here soooooooon. excited to the max,but of course! HEH.

im so so going to cut my haphazard fringe tmr!
and try to make it less haphazard(tho its kinda impossible). HAHA
SOMEONE'S SUPPOSED TO HAVE HIS HAIR CUT TMR,TOO!
you better okay! you knw who you are. HAHAHA!♥♥♥

im waaaaaiting for him,
who's rebooting his lappy since idk wht time? hah.

2009-09-01T01:25:00.003+08:00

and oh,did i mention tht it feeels way awesome
to meet my beloved besties after so long!? super miss them lah :)
and im glad none of us have changed!!
sam's still noisy, zhen's still mother-ly,cx's still blur & im still as irritating:D
awwww. honestly,they really do mean the world to me! ♥♥♥

and i so cant wait for 09.09.09! :D
just dont make me walk all the way fr orchard to esplanade,
when im fasting,all over again, pleeeeeeeeeeeeease! HAHAHA.

2009-09-01T00:43:00.003+08:00

its been a pretty hectic weekend fer me,and i like! hehe :)
sat, went fer rod night. met my beloved squadmates after sooo long!
had fun,laughing our asses off, screaming our lungs out and
singing pearly shells & warfront cheer all over again,
remincisng those years we shared back then in sec sch life.
i definitely miss those moments! 22th will forever be my love :')

sunday -had religious class in the morning as usual.
then rushed off to amk to meet ♥. went costa sands tgt :)
eventho i dint even stay overnight due to some personal reasons,
i definitely had fun watching twillight on the small beds,
laughing at weiyang's fringe almost getting caught on fire and etc. HAHA
and most imptly,cos i got to spend time with ♥ by the sea and all(:
cos i freaking hell missed him, and i still do now! :(

den we break fast at Bbq Chicken at Downtown!!
ive been begging him to bring me thr,since ever! HAHA! :P
and we sat at the nice2 pink cushions.
which we've always been wanting to sit at since the ferst time we saw them.
below is a pic oh him,which makes me melt so bad everytime i look at it.hehe!

then bade farewell to my a9l2-mates,and i felt bad tht he
didnt return back to chalet,as he sent me home and it was alrd late by den :(
returned home,and tht had to be one of the most horrible nights in my life
cos i could hardly rmb anything else once i got home. :/
and the next day had to be the worst hangover(so-called) everrr.

today(mon) went back to sch with zhen. met beloved FASIHAH n frens!:)
some seniors whom i HARDLY recognize. honestly,lots of ppl changed!
and idk why but ppl kept saying tht i lost a lot of weight. so weird! HAHA
and oh,they still laugh at me fer being vertically-challenged. PHFT!:P
chill at zhen's house,watched a movie. blabla. thts bout it :)

and oh,i didnt meet ♥ today.
effing miss him. no shit. ugh! :(

on a brighter note,im making raye cookies starting fr tmr onwards!
excited to the max,but of course! hehe!

2009-08-25T21:06:00.004+08:00

i think i look like a freaking dead fish now :/
thanks to the beloved end of year semester exams. ugh.
2 more papers to go! and im so falling ill. shit sey :(

sth tells me i shld start now,
but pls eh. i can hardly keep my eyes open!
double ugh.

ps. thanks my ♥ for teaching me OC!
and the wonderful break-fast ytd and chill-arnd today :)
ilysm! :) :)

sometimes,i can't help but to wonder if you still do think of her.

2009-08-22T23:28:00.002+08:00

the world is gonna throw us a million reasons
why this isn't gonna workout between us,
but i'm armed with one reason why it will ♥

2009-08-22T01:24:00.002+08:00

pipc paper was super shitty. period.
i studied my ass off and the paper was like,wth!? HAHA.
since tmr's the 1st day of fasting month,
♥ and i decided to treat ourselves to a heavy lunch at Fish&Co!:D
it was my first time eating thr,too mind you! hehe.
he spent 68plus bucks on us. shit. i still feel so guilty sey:/
will pay back part of the amt uh. whtever it is,thanks eh,my ♥ !:)

planning to mug my ass off fer hap the whole day of tmr.
I'D BETTER! if not,omg. i'll hate myself so bad sey. tsk

its 1.28am and im hungry alrd. shit.
what more surviving through a WHOLE day of hap revision w/o beloved food!?OMG.
nvm,i believe tht i can do it. go me. HAHAHA.

on the brighter side,
im so becoming holy-er at this period of time so yeah!:D :D

and oh! im verrrrrrrrrrrrry,teramat happy bout the news tht
♥ told to me over the phone bout his mummy, hehe!
you knw,i knw lah eh :)

2009-08-20T00:14:00.002+08:00

ive to quit feeling so empty,at the most random times.
only a day more to pipc paper. and im so not ready. f___.

i want to grow tall,please!
and oh,skinny just like her.

im so not okay.
wth.

2009-08-17T23:40:00.002+08:00

The usual cure to all my misery hangovers = my boy ♥
i had fun with him,the studying and all :)

still,i can't help drowning my sorrows in a pool of procrastination.
Which is why I'm not doing my hap/oc revision now.

damnit.

I suck.

or maybe its plainly cos im hungry.
cos im starving myself as im soo gaining weight. even he says so!:/
and hungry = grumpy, no?

i must love pipc. i must love pipc. i must love pipc.
i must love pipc. i must love pipc. i must love pipc.
i must love pipc. i must love pipc. i must love pipc.
i must love pipc. i must love pipc. i must love pipc.
i must love pipc. i must love pipc. i must love pipc.

yes,pipc paper in just 3 days time.
zura please focus alrd.
make sure tmr start on pipc,okay you bitch!

:)

2009-08-14T00:02:00.002+08:00

i wish you didnt have to lie.
i wish i didnt have to trust you so bad.
i wish you'd keep to ur words of being honest to me.
i wish i didnt have to shed any tears on the eve & on our 1st anni.

so much for being honest.
.....

i wish i dont love you so much.
cos it kills me more than ever now. :(

but i do..

2009-08-13T01:21:00.003+08:00

perhaps its true when they say;sorrow comes right before happiness.
tht you'll have to get through the rain to get the rainbow.
i'm glad tht after everything,it didnt end up with all tears anyway.
we managed to work tgt,through our differences! :) :)

happy 1st monthsary,my boy!♥
you knw,i love you so. (:

&& i hope you'd love the lil sth which ive prepared for you. :D

2009-08-12T22:58:00.001+08:00

tht had to be the most painful 15mins of my life. yet.
tht was also the only time of my life,when i sew,with tears in my eyes.

2009-08-11T23:48:00.002+08:00

i'll be lying through my teeth if i were to say tht
im not worried at all for the upcoming exams. in fact,im super worried okay!:/
just tht,i cant seem to get a grip on myself & start studying alrd! shit sey.
reality check; 9mre days to exam. i sooo gotta start revising alrd,pronto!
fasting month gonna be here soon. :((: hoping to make more pahale. haha!
accompanied ♥ to cut his hair,right after sch at kovan. now he look like lil boy.
little boy with spiky hair. like awwwww,so cute. HAHA! :P

and oh,ring-shoppinggg was a disaster.
dont even ask why. HAHAHA.
least we managed to get a really nice pair.
once again, thanks ♥! :)

i soooooo gotta start on my revision soon.
tomorrow,tht is! haha! go zura,go! :D

and oh!
i miss my dwarfettes. no shit! :(

2009-08-08T01:21:00.002+08:00

you know all I can think of is you
for this evening I will play back every message that you sent
& I will sleep to the sound of your voice
now I don't like using words like forever
but I will love you til the end of today
&& in the morning when I remember everything that you are,
I know I'll fall for you all over again.

2009-08-08T00:03:00.002+08:00

dont mind my irritating face!
and awww,hes so cute right! stupid,candid pic. heh ;D

voice,please come back sooon!
i think ive actually forgotten how i originally sound like sey :( haha!

once again,tgif! its been an awfully exacting week with the stupid tests & all.
but thankfully,ive my boy♥ with me who has nvr left my side,
esp when i needed him the most. simply,the awesome-est! :) hehe.
we survived the most dreaded subjs tgt-biochem,pipc & oc! blithe,enough said:D
he did so much for me,those little2 things which simply touch my heart
every day of my life. which will never fail to put a smile on my face :)
if only he knws how much i love him for trying so hard to be a romantic ass,
as he knws tht he aint one. hahaha! so sweeeeet right? fuh! hehe.

im so glad tht the weekends is here alrd,but its still quite a despair
as i would not be able to meet him :(
but oh hell. absence makes the heart grow fonder,no? heh! ;)

i can't help imagining him with his guitar at the beach,
serenading me with his super melodious voice,
looking right into my eyes....
(well you get it,right? haha!)

how i wish,it'd happen.
well,maybe someday. (:

2009-08-05T23:24:00.004+08:00

today was alright,besides the fact tht i still sound like a frigging guy/rocker. \m/
studied & makan-ed with him fr 9 till 1 like tht. oh,he's an amazinggg teacher!(:
and yes we skipped,2 hrs of frigging biochem. and no,i dont feel guilty at all.HAHA
studied my ass off (sorta!) for oc test. hope i can pass it! :D
and he's just like the sweeeetest thing ever u knw! :P
he actually helped me clean my super dirty pencil case,while i was studying!
like fuh kan! pls lah. you can hardly find this type of species alrd u knw.hehe!

den we skipped maths stats(didnt feel guilty!) and had a loooong chat at ljs.
thanks my boy,for the listening ear. you knw i love you so,yeah? ♥

i feeeeel fat. like shit sey. i gotta go for a run,pronto!
still waiting for the drowsiness to sink in. cough syrup,work ur magic alrd!:)

cos its the little things tht made me fall in love with you. ♥♥

2009-08-05T01:29:00.003+08:00

i don't even want to think about it.
somehow,thrs this depressing aura which affects me so.
i hate being a loser. & right now, i can't help but to feel like one.

2009-08-03T23:32:00.002+08:00

throat hurts really,realllly bad! ):
to an extent of losing my voice, and sounding like a guy now. ugh!
i so shld have listened to boyf wen he told me not to eat the laksa
and drink the Ice milo. shit lah. why must i be so stubborn!? haha!
2nd lunch with him was funnnnnnn. as usual!(:
but wht rocks more was when i went to AMK park with him.hee

i (kinda) forced him to siiiiing for me. :P
cos his voice's like gold like tht sey. sing also so diff meh!? HAHA!
but he did so la! he was painfully shy at the start,
but after awhile, think he got used to me staring at his face,
trying to make him lose his concentration. hahaha!
and omg,i was soo awed lah cos he can really really sing!!
as in no shit! tho his voice may not sound very (erm) guy-ly,
but eh when he sings, sound like a guy leh. i kept asking him bout tht. HAHAHA

aiseh,bottomline is my boyf can sing super well
and im mighty proud of it. HEHE!
be jealous okay! hahahaha! :P

and and oh,did i mention tht he can play the guitar pretty well,too?:D!
okay,why am i even promoting him to the public!? hahaha!

all i'm trying to say is tht he really,really rocks my socks off,
and i love him so :)

2009-08-02T02:18:00.003+08:00

fri was slaaaack like shit. and i had fun with my girls,going all crazy,
jumping arnd & screaming our heads off,in the stupid neoprint booth. (:

today is my sleeeeeping day!:D
i woke up,bathed,ate,watched tv,vacuumed da home and slept again.
hehe. feels gooooood to be able to have some eye-shut after so long!(:
and oh i had a lil tiff with him ytd. was otp till arnd 4am.
urgh,i hate it when shits happen. but whtever it is,im glad we are fine now:D
&& i love him more than ever now. (:

2 tests next weeek. excluding a stupid csas practical assesment thingy.
im soooo not looking forward to next week! :(
on the bright side, i cant wait to meet him! :D :D

its 228am. i shld so be rolling arnd on my bed now. haha!

ps; i love you.

2009-07-31T00:27:00.003+08:00

boyf literally forced me to blog. eviiiiil or what. HAHA!
neway biochem test 2,was alright. i didnt do much of a studying tho. :/
till the very last half an hour. dont ask why. hahaha.
let's hope i can pass the damn paper,and make llyod a happy man!:)
2 more tests next weeek. UGH. stop it sey. like we dont have enough!?
at least,ive the best-est boyf one can ever have. :)

thanks my boy,for motivating me so so much!! ♥
and although you did say some mean things in the bus just now,
dont worry. you are so forgiven.
you knw,i knw lah eh. HAHAHA! :P

friday,pls come soooooooooon! :)

one day,i caught myself smiling for no reason.
then i realized; i was thinking of you. (:

2009-07-29T01:06:00.002+08:00

my cramp is killing me.
i wish im a boy right now. no shit.
i think im a living wreck.
its depressing to even think bout biochem.

and oh,
i love my mat, alot :)

2009-07-27T01:34:00.001+08:00

i love him sooooo much.

enough said,eh? :)

2009-07-26T04:31:00.001+08:00

its 430 am and im still not asleeep.
i hate it when i think TOO much,
when ive fallen too much in love.

and this f-up insecure feeeling tht i cant seem to shake off.
boy,forgive me for being so weak..

2009-07-26T02:49:00.003+08:00

my own boyf said tht im the type of person who is always blinded by love.
im still wondering whther its a compliment. or not. :/

guys, and their PMS(es).
:/ :/ :/

2009-07-25T00:47:00.003+08:00

you're the reason why i draw those stupid hearts all over my books. ♥

anyway,tgif!:D
i so neeeed the sleep man.
and psh,tmr's gonna suck. :(

2009-07-20T22:51:00.004+08:00

think ive suffered enough heartache for the day..
i hope it stops hurting. soon.

whtever it is, i love Astiana Mawan more than anything else!
nth in this world cld be compared to you,girl. u knw tht :)

and sry cuz(s) if i didnt tell u nithing bout my bf..
was planning to tell when i meet u guys? heh.
i miss you people,too btw.

2009-07-19T00:29:00.002+08:00

girl,if only you'd tell me wht i did,
den i promise, i wont do it ever again.
and i really dont want our friendship to turn sour..
sigh. pls tell me whr i went wrong?

im getting paler as time goes by now. lips and all.
and im so not liking it. and ive to stop losing weight so fast!
this is so scaring me:/

and i gotta buy new earphones,pronto!
i cant survive w/o music.
just like how i cant deal with life,w/o you ♥

2009-07-15T23:55:00.002+08:00

okay this picture is just waaaay cute to me. cute nk mampos! hahahaha!
i think he looks mat-tier now, but hell lah. i still love him neway! :D
and hes thee sweeetest! no shit :D :D

Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend;
a stuffed animal,
one of his sweatshirts,
and a really pretty ring.
Even if it's not a serious relationship. <3

^ found this somewhr on Xanga.
find it really,really cute. soyeah. haha!
okay, just how random can i get? :)

2009-07-14T00:08:00.000+08:00

2009-07-12T15:04:00.002+08:00

just when i feel super semangat to do my hwks fr tmr,
the stupid BlackBoard system could nt even be assessed! like UGH!
stupid shit or what! thank god, thrs only like 2 assignments to be done:D
and later at arnd 5 will be off to Masjid Wak Hassan fr some
religious cls thingy with cousins and makciks. :)

i've been thinking bout you (since god knws wen),
when i knw i ought not to.
cos its just wrong.

way,waaay wrong.

2009-07-11T01:08:00.003+08:00

"Love,is when someone takes your heart and shatters it,

& you still love them with all the little pieces"

i don't even knw why im feeling this way,towards you. shit.

whtever it is, i still wont have the courage to do it. so yeah.

it's a good thing,no?

2009-07-09T00:46:00.001+08:00

98 reasons why its better to be a girl

1. We can use tears as a threat.
2. We always carry mints.
3. We can have as many shoes as we want and nobody cares.
4. We can be some of the meanest people on earth, while most guys think we're adorable.
5. Friday Night Sleepovers
6. If we get upset we can make the men sleep on the sofa.
7. We can cook.
8. We can sing.
9. We can get manicures, pedicures, & massages without being called gay
10.We are organized.
11. Most guys won't hit us.
12. We always have a comeback.
13. We know how to smell good.
14. We know just what to say to make someone happy or to ruin their life.
15. We mature quicker.
16. We aren't scared to have kids
17. We don't lose a friendship if we both like a guy, we duke it out til someone wins.
18. We're not afraid to ask for directions.
19. We can always find someone to pay for our drink.
20. The wedding is just how we want it.
21. If we're picky eaters, we can just say "I'm on a diet."
22. We slap hard.
23. We look pretty in pink.
24. It was the women God trusted to have children.
25. We know how to get the attention of the opposite sex.
26. We are better decorators.
27. We're not afraid to dance just because we can.
28. We love to smile.
29. We can flirt and flaunt all we want.
30. We don't get half as many speeding tickets.
31. We have girlfriends to turn to when we get in a fight with our boyfriend.
32. We know how to encourage a breakup or makeup, so the guy better respect a girl's friends.
33. We have hopes and dreams and plans for the future.
34. We can wear skirts OR pants.
35. We know how to look pretty.
36. We're tempting.
37. Most of us look for the best in people.
38. We look younger longer.
39. We don't have to pay for dinner.
40. We have style.
41. We're ALWAYS winners.
42. We have the ability to nurture our children, whether to turn them good or evil.
43. We always have time to play tea party.
44. We KNOW when something is wrong with our friends.
45. A big vocabulary makes us sound elegant, not like nerds.
46. We can grow our hair out as long as we want.
47. We're not satisfied to just lay around and watch TV.
48. We're the subject of all the love songs.
49. We can think people are hot and not want to date them.
50. We always check caller ID.
51. We love hot chocolate no matter how old we are.
52. We don't have to drink beer to feel mature.
53. We can sit through an opera without throwing things.
54. We can stand up to the people who threaten to beat us up.
55. We always get stronger when heartbroken, instead of desperate.
56. We ALWAYS know who's in charge.
57. We don't dread packing five suitcases.
58. We're willing to buy expensive gifts.
59. We aren't as rash in decision-making.
60. We know how to boost a guy's ego.
61. We know how to get a party started.
62. We can come up with excuses NOT to see you.
63. Our role-models can be women OR men.
64. No matter how mean we are, we can always get someone to fall in love with us.
65. Most of the time we can make vengeful intentions look sweet.
66. We wake up in the morning saying, "Good morning sunshine!" instead of "SHIT IM LATE!"
67. If we aren't really happy, we can always fake a smile when its important to him.
68. We can pass notes without getting caught.
69. We're satisfied as long as we're having fun.
70. We don't swear to just to look tough.
71. Promises are important to us, whether given or received.
72. We aren't afraid to throw things at someone of the opposite sex.
73. We trust our boyfriends when they say "its a surprise"
74. Listening to someone of the opposite sex sing, especially if they have a bad voice, will make our day.
75. We don't always say what we mean.
76. We don't care about a boy's popularity status.
77. We'll fight for a guy's love.
78. We can wear TWO earrings.
79. We can like the Backstreet Boys without getting made fun of.
80. We can hug anyone we want without being considered "soft".
81. We don't have to be able to bench a lot to be considered strong.
82. We're not afraid to go to marriage counseling.
83. We can cry during sad movies and laugh about it later.
84. People make new sports just for us (softball & cheerleading).
85. When we do poorly in school, we can blame it on the teacher.
86. We can wear makeup.
87. We're willing to say "I love you" more than once a day, in case once just isn't enough.
88. We know that when another girl cries, its not always a bad thing.
89. We can be swayed to forgive easily.
90. We can take time to make our AIM profile pretty without being considered a computer geek.
91. Our handwriting is ALWAYS better.
92. Boys don't care how wealthy we are.
93. We can be considered beautiful when we look our worst.
94. If we're not athletic we can just pretend we're not trying.
95. We can make the guy ask US if we wanna go out with him.
96. We can change our haircolor as many times as we want to whatever we want without being told we're self-obsessed.
97. We can make a big deal out of anything.
98. We're not afraid to skip, squeal, and jump for joy.

2009-06-30T22:56:00.002+08:00

im sick and tired of being a push-over.
i'm sorry that i can never be ____ enough.
i'm sorry lah,okay?

always remember tht last thing you say to people each day,
cos it just may be the last thing you ever get to say to them.

2009-06-29T21:05:00.001+08:00

times like this,i asked myself a zillion times why
im even in this damn course(and school). pui ah.
i hate,hate,haaaaaaaaate Organic Chemistry.

and did i mention how much i DETEST lab reports & tut assignments?D:

and oh, flu plainly sucks! :(

tell me,when it stops hurting

2009-06-28T23:14:00.004+08:00

one of the pics fr fri dinner with dwarfies<3.>

will upload the rest sooon,promise! :)

and oh! im so addicted to this song now. (refers to music player!)
awesomely-nice. try listening to it alright?
its an old song, but im so loving old songs neway! :D

2009-06-28T22:54:00.003+08:00

i skipped my very ferst lecture on last Wednesday.
and it CAN get pretty addictive. shits betol! :X
but it was for a gd reason - dad was warded. soyeah,gd reason okay!:)

school sucked, as usual. dont even get me started!
fri-after sch(ended 2hrs early!woo) met my dwarfies<3 fer dinner!
hung arnd mrt area thr,talked and camwhored! duh:D
will upload the pictures soon, when i dont feel like a lazy ass. heh

sat-went to grandma house.
had TONS of fun hanging arnd at Heartland Mall,Macdonalds thr
and playing Crocodile at the playgrnd with beloved cousins. HAHA!
and remniscing the past,wen we were still tiny,lil earthlings,
playing stupid games on tht VERY spot. oh how nostalgic can!:D
we were like 16to20year olds running after one another on the
not-so-huge playground. can you just imagine the sight?;P
and oh sth sth happened. shit. i hate my hand!(LOL)
i seriously gotta be mre careful wen i wana reach fer a supprt!:X hahahaha
we were perspiring like shit, but whtever;it was waaaay awesome.
we shld do more of tht some other times. hehe!

and no shit lah, why cant TP have extended holidays!? ugh!:(

sch tmr at 9am! double urgh!
bye ppl!

it was a big mistake to let me memorize your face,

2009-06-11T22:38:00.002+08:00

today is my 4th day of hols, and i did absolute nth. hahaha
okay so i did another re-run of the movie, A Walk To Remember!:)
only cos its so awwww and im a sucker for such movies, heh~!
and did i mention, i spend my hols watching movies like Ps i love you,
and 27 Dresses. they made me smile like a kuku, thru out the day(s). HEHE

and tmr morning ill be off to indonesia! woo! yeah, pretty stoked bout it:D
am going to shop my ass thr. hahahaha! like i gt alot of money like tht, tsk! (X
it will only be fer 2 days, kinda pathetic, but ahhh. better than nth eh?
ive even like made my own list of the things tht i wana buy thr.
I KNW. semangat nak mampos,kan kan kan. HAHA!

the fact that ive like several assignments UNTOUCHED kinda startles me:X
like shit or whtttt. i dont even feeel like giving a 2nd look at them can! ugh
and to Abdul Muhaimin Bin Abdul Malek;dont do any of the stupid assignments,
or you'l seriously get it fr me! and yes, its a threat. HAHAHA :P

alritey, better stop writing now.
gonna miss my cats here, i knw my sis and bro WONT feed them well,lazyasses!
nvm, i shall put alot alot of food before i go off. hahaha
and yes, i miss my dwarfclan truckloads too!
lets plan a date,somewhr nxt week:D:D

bye ppl! :)

2009-06-09T22:39:00.004+08:00

went to watch movie with this idiotic guy over here. haha!
mimin, pls dont kill me cos of da pic.
its da NICEST pic of u tht i can ever find so yeah :)

watched Monsters vs Aliens 3D, at The Cathay.
he blanjaed da tics and popcorn + drinks. thanks eh :) :)
and he slept, at some parts of da movie. bastard nk mampos -_-
but he kept denying it. he think i canot see eh, just cos of da 3d glasses. LOL
n he kept pinching me during da movie, irritating kan? hahaha! :P
and everytime i wanted to reach fer da damn popcorn,
he thought tht i was trying to touch his ___. like wth? HAHAHA~!

and going out with him = losing weight && walking arnd places in singapore
which i have not heard before. fr Small st all the way to Queen st_-hahahaha!
thanks eh mimin! and im not being sarcastic laaaaaaaaaaa. :D
and ohya, he bought num slippers, after being sooo fickled-minded!
lucky gt 3 hot num assistants to help us out.
cos im da last person, anyone should ask an opinion fr. LOLLL

and i found out tht we are wayyyyyy (almost!) da same, in some way.
like we neeed other ppl to decide fer us, being fickledminded,n blabla..
yep, and its diff going out with someone, who's almost da exact of me. haha.
but it was awesome tho, so many thanks again dude :D

and OH!
dat dude, frgot to take his jacket fr me.
means i gotta keep it fer him, till god knws wen. gah
and i washed it alrd also, since i told him it smells. HAHA.

i want to go to Indonesia asap now, serious shit! ugh!

okay, i feel super super down right now.
sigh.

2009-06-04T22:43:00.003+08:00

something tells me im the most pathetic and idiotic girl,
on this planet Earth.

tmr's my last paper, BELOVED biochem. HAHA. cam paham!:D
pantat betol nye biochem. i knw nuts bout it :(

hols are ALMOST heree, but im still pretty down :( :(
on a brighter note,i might be meeting Samantha Chua tmr!:DD

im going to miss you real badly,
&& you knw tht..

2009-06-03T22:23:00.003+08:00

have you ever felt alone, despite having a circle of friends all around you?
somehow, despite having an awesome grp of friends arnd me,
everyday in school, i cant help feeling that way. :X
empty, desolated. these words say it all.

&& i miss my bestfrieeends like ugh now, no shit :(
guess they really, do knw me best.

my faith's shaking,

2009-05-30T00:29:00.002+08:00

try not to hate me so much,
or ull end up falling for me.
HAHAHAHAHA!

cam paham! ;D

this is so random!
and its 1230pm alrd,
am so going to slp, heh.
nights ppl :DD

2009-05-23T00:22:00.004+08:00

some of the crappy poses when we webcam-whored :D!
more pics will be up soooon!
we took like alot of them lah, most are alrd on facebook! :)

maths stats1 (aka A MATHS) test today was alright.
and it wasnt surprising that i couldnt do even the FERST qn. HAHA
im seriously praying i would be able to pass it :C

thank God its friday! time to rest,rest and resttttttt! :D
but ive religious cls test on this sunday.
and friggin Lab Report test on this coming monday. D:
poly life is super,superrrr hectic. :(

2009-05-17T20:53:00.003+08:00

dear diary,
life's beginning to become a huge biatch now. & i really mean it.
for instance,poly life is so NOT high sch-ish,which was what i
had expected it to be.lol oh silly me:/ i hate myself sometimes. haha!
i have stupid pop quizzes like during almost every tutorials & lab pracs!
&& ive 3 frigging tests waiting conveniently for me next week,too. UGH!

WEDS-oc test. THURS-biochem(which i knw NUTS bout!) & lab test
and last but not least,FRI-beloved Maths n stats1 = FRIGGING AMATHS!:O
and ive my religious test this upcoming sunday too. UGHHHHHHH
could my week could get any worse!? :(
&& i still havent pay the 5dollars plus saman,fer breaking the flask
during pipc lab,2 weeks ago. HAHAHAHA. lazy uh to go pay (:

i think facebook (esp RESTAURANT CITY) is just way eviiiil.
esp to ppl who are addictive to it, ppl like mua :D ehe.
ive to complete my HAP tut soooooon (as its due tmr!).
but im too lazy to even take it out. HEHE

bye ppl! :D

2009-05-15T23:32:00.009+08:00

poly's so shitty different as compared to sec school.
i miss it super much. and these are the moments tht i super,SUPER miss!:)

dearest squadmates/NCOmates. :D
i miss kena tekan-ed by the darn CIs. (HAHA)
&& the unforgettable changing parades!:DD

awesome clsmates. esp danial,my lil bro!:)
omg,i cant believe i miss his craps and his forever blur2 attitude.
super irritating,but oh wth. hes my bro! soyeah. haha! (:

those mugging moments,during Os period.
with dearest BFFs-dwarfclan!<3>kacau-ing them,and we'll end up playing arnd:]

awwww. stepping down ceremony- for council.
no matter how sentimental i can get,as i cried for EVERY stepping dwn ceremony,
ironically i didnt cry during mine. heck. i AM werd. hahaha!

awesome moments/outings with my beloveds!

its been awfully long since we last go out tgt. ):

lets plan sth during the upcoming hols,please! :)

im dying to meet you ppl man, haha.

dearest maiifaezahusnaiin. (not in pic:husna)

i friggin miss those craps we had tgt,both in np and out.

hari raye-ing was awesome,and i miss you guys so much!

yeah,councilmates. i miss wearing tht dumb (super hot!) blazer.

(which makes me look super small & SHORT!_-)

and i miss every,little moment i had with my 19th sc,since sec1-day1 :))

i hate myself when im being all sentimental,like now. ugh!

but at least,i managed to pour out my feelings here. ehe.

nt frgetting to mention the amazing friends ive made in tp!!

esp my GANG. FROM A9L2. gang kepe. haha! :PPPPP

and ill blog once again,soon.

when i feel like it:D

2009-05-08T23:45:00.011+08:00

awesome Chocolate Truffle cake,by some of my clsmates! (:
and they gave it to me and sang me a bday song in the canteen.(ITAS)
like,omg. pretty embarrasing can. HAHA!
but its the thoughts tht counts lah. so yeah,they're super sweeeet to do tht:D
and the rest of my A9L2 mates were like wishing me all. :DD
awesome ppl lah. seriously shit love them. hahaha!

and ohya! yanti gave me 2sets of Ferrereo Rocher. like awww.
shes like a super awesome sis lah can! thanks,babe! :)

super nicee frame(with our very ferst pic)
and hand-SEWN slice of cake,fr dearest iylia syaza (bte hamdan) haha!
she sew the cake herself,and i knw it took alot of pain & effort in it,
so thank u so much lah,girl! :D i effing love you! :)

and yes,iylia grew bored during one of the lectures,
so,she began doodling on my hand. hahaha
and her handwriting is awesome,too can! :]

then after da last cls ended,mimin blanja-ed me swensens!:D
surprising right? it should be lah,since we hardly get along with each other. LOL!
or maybe its my bday thts y,hes like EXTRA nice to me. hahaha

this is the complimentary bday gift tht we gt,fr free. hahaha
i find it super cute. lol esp da super short candle;
which fyi,doesnt stand fer da height of da bday person,okay mimin! HAHA!

and awww fer dessert,i psycho-ed him into buying this,since ive
NEVER eaten anything like it before soyeah. i dont knw the name tho. lol
i just knw tht its superrrr nice and wah,serious shit lah. mouth-watering:D

and the surprising thing is tht muhaimin went;'you can eat whtever you want'
and i went HAHAHA,SERIOUS AH?! (lol!)
of course lah gt rule. must finish them. haha. and he still forced me to finish my
drink. like wth. hahaha. hes seriously like my father lah. LOL!
anyway,thanks ah mimin fer da treat. u spend so much man.
i feel so guilty,lol. thanks once again!:]
kk i admit,ure nice. haha!

and this is a pic of a brownie-cake Famous Amos which rahimi gave(:
its pretty big lah, and the plastic bag is just HUMONGOUS.
had a hard time carryign my stuffs home since i dont have a proper bag,
but yeah. it smells and looks really nice! :)
i havent taste it tho, still super full fr dinner with mimin. haha!

thanks to my dearest dwarfclan also fer da super cute gifts!
will upload the pic in another entry(: hehe,love u babes lots!:DD

anyway a HUGE thanks to these ppl(not in ANY order);
kenny,zai,mimin,astiANA,reezal,zamira,tsunami,kakpah,croc,fasihah,
bamboo,bestf(jarratt),danial,yanti,nur,azITA,pe ah,shaunice,aidil,ruzzie,
steph,yanie,soffian,rasyid,rahimi,wan,muthe,shakita,
umang2(she called me PERSONALLY even tho we're like both online. LOL)
sab(fr putting my bday wish on ur pm!) & A9L2!:)

so sry if ive frgotten to list down ur name. heh
once again,thanks fer all the wishes and stuffs :P

2009-04-28T21:58:00.004+08:00

our veryyyy first lab(BIOCHEM) lesson!
and it was way awesome:D
& i think llyord george is an awesome lecturer,too! :)

im too tired to even start revising my PIPC,ugh!

ps; HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY MUHAIMIN! (aka mimin!)
stay rocking,okay! :DDD

2009-04-26T21:36:00.002+08:00

yaye,i finally revised on HAP-Human Anatomy & Physiology
and am able to understand wht the damn things are all about! :)
hopefully i can rmb the info fer a long,long timee:D
am resting now. gonna start touching on OC-Organic Chem soon!
im still shagged fr ytd. and the previous week's activities. lol

gah,okay ppl.
im too tired to say niting much. haha!
so,ill blog soon okay? (:

2009-04-23T20:08:00.002+08:00

i feel super shagged everyday,like wth. LOL
i salute aidil for travelling all the way fr bedok to yishun,everyday
for duno how many years. cos im doing the same now.
and it's been only the 4th day of sch,& i alrd feel like dying!haha!
serious shit,or maybe its also because of the super exacting orientation
tht the freshies had,during the whole of last weeek. ah,perhaps.
i havent talked bout orientation,have i? lol

well,it was simply awesome. esp cos AS won best cheer,for the 3rd time!:D
and yeah,memorable games such as Milo Gargle & Scrub The Deck,
are simply UNFORGETTABLE. i gt awesome bruises on my legs,
&& now i have phobia of drinking milo. like seriously. haha!
ill tell u guys bout these game,one day,wen i can alright?:D

bio is seriously such a serial killer. i wasnt like dozing off or nithing.
but i just simply could NOT absorb any friggin info in my head. LOL
maybe its cos i was using too much of my brain cells,fer Organic Chem
earlier on this morning. grr. i asked arnd. clsmates were in the same state,too.haha!
im still stuggling with chem. who am i kidding? my module consist of like
90% of friggin chemistry!? HAHAHA. but i shant give up!:)

and lectures are zzzzzzzzzzz. :X
dint have to buy labcoat,cos am taking sis' (:
mum just bought me a no-degree specs also fer lab clses.
now left ziplock bag. gah. super mafan uh.

tmr sch's gonna just be 2 hours of PIPC sth lesson. fr 9 to 11am.
i dont even knw wht tht stands for.LOL
den stupid talk fr 11.30 till 12. ____-
den thrs this Wheelbarrow challenge thingy at 4.
so fr 12 to 4; im gona pray,makan,gym-ing with kenny & others.
yeah,hope i wont be too exhausted man. hahaha

k ppl,i gota go pray
and (maybe) revise my notes!

bye ppl! :)

2009-04-21T22:43:00.002+08:00

ahhh,ytd was the ferst day of sch. had only 3hours of lesson.
so was today. so pathetic can! hahahaha
played this game thingy called 2ND Life. i dint even have an account.LOL
bottomline is,i had fun laughing my ass off with sab & syiqin(: awesme grpmates!
and finally ive solved my problem of assesing the friggin BBlearning.
thanks to the auntie in One Stop Centre(HAHA!),and some other awesme ppl
who tried their best to help me. heh. thanks ppl!:D

tmr's gona be a loooooooong day; 10am til 6pm. GAH
on the bright side,ive 4hours of break in total tmr. HAHA.
im beginning to love poly now lah can! :)
okay minus the part;tht i feel super small and LOST(most of the times)
in the sch building. everyones' like giants_- or maybe im super short.LOL
and its so diff den sec sch,in a sense that to meet ur frens is
so friggin diff lah can! and yes,frens are only either fr cls or AS. hahaha

felt pretty feverish today. gah
i wana go sch tmr! my ferst lecture(s):D
k ppl,gota go pray and (maybe)off to slp:)

restaurant city under maintenance:(

bye ppl!:D

2009-04-12T21:10:00.003+08:00

its been so long since i last blogged. heh
paiseh lah. beeen friggin addicted to Facebook. LOL
and sam calls me a bimbo since im SO into it now. haha!:P
pet society & restaurant city is thee shitttttt or wht! :D
sch's starting in 2days time. mixed feeelings:X
i wish i could be more excited and enthu towards it. ohwells.
i dont even knw wht attire im supposed to wear on the friggin ferst day.HAHA!
okay so im such a loser. but the worst part is that,ive no to ask to):
ppl i knw thr are either seniors or fr diff courses. hahaha
ahhhh its 9.14pm now. needa do my prayers.
will blog soon,when i feel lyke it :)

im a wreck.

2009-04-07T01:35:00.001+08:00

today was simply awesome:D
will blog more once im back fr Msia!

its 1.37am now. gosh!
gotta sleep. haha!
bye ppl (:

2009-04-05T16:42:00.003+08:00

replies to tagboard! :)

to mira - how random can you get? haha! neway cant wait fer tmr!(;
to kak pah - YES! finally sia,get to meet you after SO long:]
to SAM - whts so cool bout having an overnight camp. I DONT WANT!); LOL
to guan jie - STOP CALLING ME SMURF! HAHAHA
to JARRATT - haha! i love gym-ing mah!:D n ur pics ARE nicee whtttt :)
to ezah - tau tkpe. haha. kitorang kan belos,tkleh angkat sey. ehe!
to reezal - enjoying? okaylah,can say so. starting sch soon. UGH! haha
to aidil - yes,i rmbed your bday. be flattered,OKAY! haha! no muffins tho;)

and ill blog sooon.
when i feeel like it:D

2009-04-02T19:58:00.000+08:00

Because her heart can't lie, even though her face may try.

i hate you,chestpains..

2009-04-02T18:44:00.006+08:00

went to watch Unborn,yes a horror movie.

wasnt all THAT scaryyy but alot of erm shocking scenes.

which made ezah and i screamt at times. LOL!

we had cute lil popcorns & drinks. so small lah can,haha!

and theres this old man(elderly?) sitting right infront of us.

kept making weeeird,think sth's up with him. lol

den walked arnd AMK hub,camwhored like belo-s (: ehe

it was simply hilarious lah tdayyy!:DD

laughed my ass off so many times. thanks eh,pe ah:D
tmr gna swim! and then eat with dearest cuzzies :)

oh please dont cancel the outing ppl~! haha

i wana eat,heh.

will blog again,when i feel like it? ehe :]

2009-04-01T22:34:00.002+08:00

you know what? im furious to the max lah can!
___ asked fer ezah's no JUST BCOS im going to the movies with her.
cos she still dont effing trust me. like wtf can.
& yes,thts da ferst F-werd i said after oh so long. ugh!
ferst she asked fer maii's no cos i frequently gym-ed & swim with her.
now this. like OMG WHAT THE HELL LAH.
can someone/anyone give me some air to breathe?
ferst and foremost,im not a little child who cant bloody hell tc of herself.
and im not a frigging whore who will f__ with every guy i see on the street.
after so much tht i had sacrificed and gone thru fer da fam,this is what i get?
i sacrificed my WHOLE life fer it;quit my job,stay at home &
stare at the walls and decrease my iq,follow wenever my mum goes_-
and can hardly go out with anyone else in this planet.

and yes i help my fam,with all my heart.
but this is the kind of treatment tht i get? oh cmon lah.
anyone else in my position would have slit his/her throat or sth.
and no,you ppl dont understand me. the kind of pain my heart
had to go thru,every single sec of my life. ever since the prob occurs.
yes,i may smile and laugh,n pretend as if everythings just fine.
but please lah. everyone have their limits. im nt a friggin zombie.
feelings,i have them too. all tht you guys care bout,are yourselves.
and when any shitty things happen,all fingers point to me.
i never did,and still do not want to show how i really feel and all.
cos i dont want to affect anyone else.n i knw no one will really be bothered neway.
its impossible to even describe how i was/am. haiz,forget it.

every night,i cry myself on the bed. praying tht id go to slp.
it hurts so bad tht even simple things like slping & eating has been diff now.
and i wake up every morning,wondering why life has to be so hard on me.
only God knws how painful & diff it is to step out of the house,n just..smile.
sth tht i can simply do,months ago. i pray to God everyday,fer strength.
and im thankful tht im up to this far. but still...

this is my friggin blog so if any of u decide to read it and tell/whine the whole
damn thing on wht ive written to your parents or whoever shit,
you simply have no life. cos apparently ive found out tht a whiner
reads my blog and told on me,the personal stuffs which i blogged.
and obviously it spreads to my mum. like woah right.
and whiner,if u happen to be reading this;lemme tell u tht i do knw
tht ure tht ass who tell on me months ago,and maybe even till now.
i didnt and havent confronted you yet,cos i find it pointless.
i dunt think straining our relationship is gna help. im just..sad.
feel pretty much back-stabbed. but ohwell,wht can i do?
and dont worry,im not a bitch who will tell on u to the rest of our cuz.
if you think id do tht. den ure way wrong. just stop with all this nonsense.
if ure not happy with my life,maybe u want to have my life or sth,
just come straight to my friggin face and tell.

i f___ing hate my life. werld's just falling apart.
thrs a quote saying tht God wont give u sth tht u cant handle.
i wonder just how much longer can i go thru all this.
i wonder..

i may be banged up mentally & emotionally,but everyday
i walk outstide with a smile on my face,cause thts just who i am.

2009-04-01T21:30:00.004+08:00

this week is prettyyy hectic fer me. i like! haha!

ytd met up rahimi fer while to collect the notes. thanks lah can!:)

den went to sch tgt with maii & iifa to collect cert/testi.

tday,went to gym with maii in the morning (:

werk-ed out our ass-es off,after a LOONG time. hahaha

den ate n played arcade,the usual games lyke House Of The Dead:D

and i introduced Photohunt to her!MY FAV! haha.

rushed home to accompany mum to go to SSC.

n im pooooooooped now. ugh.

tmr going to watch movie with ezah!:)

after so friggin long of not meeting her. i miss her lah can! heh

not sure the exact timing. but still confirming ((:

on friday most prob gonna celebrate zai bday with dearest cuzzies:D

by going swimming ferst,den eat somewhr uh. haha

still not confirmed. cos the rest are forever busy. LOL

and i just bought a NEW set of swimsuit! still with skirt. lol

i think its prettttty cos its my fav colour,so but of course i love it:]

another reason why i cudnt wait fer swimming with cuz on fri:)

tmr's aidil's bday.

HAPPY ADVANCE 17TH

BIRTHDAY,ASS!:D

im hungryy. ehe

bye ppl (:

2009-03-31T13:24:00.001+08:00

IM EXCITED! HAHAHA!

ENOUGH SAID :D

and its just a day before __'s bday.

hmmm.

2009-03-31T13:15:00.002+08:00

i feel like meeting rahimi to get some sch notes fr him.
cos im alrd starting some revision to get ready fer poly (:
but dont knw if hes free tday,infact i havent even ask him yet. LOL!
besides,i need a male company. after so long. or ill turn into a les.haha

and sch's starting in 2 weeks time. im super scared:X
supposedly thought thrs gna be somebody whos gna accompany me and all..
but yeah,lets skip tht thoughts. looks like i gota be independant,
fer a long time now. cos i dont knw anyone thr):
and thrs gna be an overnight camp. i dont likee. haha!
esp when ive no friends thr. grr. i hate myself lah.

k,this post is random.
gotta go (:

2009-03-31T13:02:00.003+08:00

im bored like shit. ugh!
being boyfriend-less is super boring esp when thrs
no one to whine to,and complain bout how miserable my life is.LOL
bt come to think of it,im seriously sick of guys.
n no,i wont turn into a freaking lesbian (: hahaha

my ___ is home now. i hate ___. i hate home,once again now.

johor bahru was terrible. i so cant live in a kampung house. HAHA
i spent 3/4 of the time thr staring at the lizards on the walls(LOL!),
and 1/4 wondering what i should do the next min or so _-
my friends thr were the cute lil kids and cats which i fed :]
jb mats are super scaryy cos i was afraid of being pukau-ed. hahaha
sry,no eng translation. haha. & when they stare,they seriously stare O.O
some approached me,and i literally ran my ass off. HAHA!

many other stuffs happened,too lazy to blog.
and i couldnt stop thinking bout ___.
not even for a sec.
i hate myself fer being so weak/gullible ):

k,i wana eat.
meeting maii at 4 at mac yishun later (:
bye ppl!

2009-03-30T23:27:00.002+08:00

just came back fr msia. 3days thr,ugh.
accompanied grandparents to find cure fer their 'illness'.lol
im poooooooooooooooooooooped like hell. heh

tmr going back yt in the aftrnoon to get cert/testimonial with maii&iifa:)
and meeting maii earlier with our lappy-s at Mac. haha!
we're pretty naive but so whtttt. lol!
and thurs,most prob going watch movie with ezah!
i super duper miss her lah cannnnnn :D
gna have cousin outing soon,but God knws when uh. LOL

alright,i wana rest alrd.
bye ppl! (:

2009-03-25T11:28:00.017+08:00

ytd went to visit uncle (zai's dad) who's in the hospital.
TTH,my favourite hospital cann. heh
and here are the pics we took due to boredom!:)
its been SO LONG since i took pics,so yaye! hehe.
and i love them to bits :DD
cos they sooo make my day :]

enjoy the pics,ppl!:D

nur said zai & i look lyke a couple_- HAHA!

i dont even knw wht we were trying to do. LOL!

retarded faces. yaye!;D

2009-03-24T22:53:00.001+08:00

cos I'm horrible when it comes to healing,
I prefer to pick at my own wounds.

2009-03-23T11:51:00.003+08:00

just came back fr swimming with umang2!
and im tiirrred to the max! ugh. no kidding sey.
despite the fact tht i dont know how to swim. haha!
but i did learn how to selam(dive) here & thr,and swim alil!
a MAJOR improvement lah kay! heh. ;)
was supposed to meet at 8am,but both of us were late.as usual.LOL
thus our dearest Friend,Mr Sun was out. gahh.

gona go out again in a few mins time.
Mum asked to accompany her to go to Daiso and stuffs. GAH.
i swear man,once i reach home later,ill just plop! right onto my bed:D

&& swimming reminds me of _____.
ohhh boy ):

2009-03-21T22:33:00.000+08:00

this effing guy irritates me OH SO MUCH.
and i hate him in 2001 & am still hating him. LOL
cos hes officially an irritant,but on the brighter side,
he makes me smile and laugh my ass off. :D

grandma is sickk.
went to visit her just now.
and im still not okay. ):

2009-03-20T23:15:00.000+08:00

Maybe I was naÎve, got lost in your eyes,
and never really had a chance.
my mistake, I didn't know how to be in love
you had to fight to have the upper hand
I had so many dreams about you and me.
Happy endings, well now I know...

And its too late for you,and your white horse
to catch me now.

- White Horse by Taylor Swift

2009-03-16T13:23:00.000+08:00

my aunt says im bony now,my back and all.
maybe its cos ive lost fr 49 to 42kg,of shitty weight? hmmm. sighh
all day,ill feel super feverish && weak.
lyke a friggin zombie. and sometimes,i cant even think (rightt).
and sch's starting in 1234567890' days time. HOW!? )':
and i prayyyy tht i can make it fer sam's bday celebration with
DC tmr. the last time i (actually) went out,FOR REAL,was God knws when D:
and most prob,i cant make it tmr. OH WTH CANN. HAIZ.
maybe i should just shut my trap now,cos it really doesnt make any difference.

even someone with cement for a heart will get hurt,

2009-03-14T21:46:00.000+08:00

only God knws the kind of pain tht i feel,then and now.
i feel like a ____ puppet,with feeling of pins & thorns on my body.
i wish i could stop thinking bout nothing,and start sleeping.
i hope all this pain will come to an end soon. cos yeah,
i cant take it any longer. whts worse,ive no one with me.
im a walking zombie on this planet Earth now,yaye me.

2009-03-12T23:15:00.000+08:00

haiz,im so completely physically & mentally drained.
only God knws how much i tried to be strong and move on.
no one knws bout the heart of mine,tht has been so utterly
shattered,much more torn. everythings driving me insane.
i dont knw why ppl would be so cruel,in this world.
nobody and NOTHING can make me fine ever again.
ill smile(or even laugh) but,i duno how much of this pretense
i can take. 17 years of pretense is never easy.

cos im fading away,

2009-03-10T21:58:00.000+08:00

k,heres thee pic! :)
i kept laughing,cos we looked like cheerleaders,HAHA! ;D
ohwell,but trust me. up-close,the tee is really simple yet awesome:)